No.4 What i want you to know..

Sometimes i just want to know what do you really think about me ..

Dear friend of mine ,

I really want to let you know that i honestly care for you , I never want to loose a friend like you . Sometimes i just really want to know what you're feeling , i'm a friend who care for you no matter how much you hate me or think that i'm some type of annoying friend . Why can't you understand that i'm here for you !!

Do you know how i felt when you ignored me today ?i seriously cant stay back , what can I do ?you can say that i'm lazy and all those shitty stuff but I wasn't lying about it .. izit because of me ? because of what happen before that you turn into someone that you are not?To me from the first day i met you , you're like that Happy-Go-Lucky girl , you're that friend that make me feel like " she's the one i can trust in my college life , i must cherish the moment i spend with her " you even made me change into a better person eventhough we just know each other like 3 months .There's something you need to know too , that i really care for you as a friend !If there is something that i made you misunderstand or dislike just tell me ! i rather you tell me then not telling me ... pleaseee just tell me i really am being honest to you everyday ... please ..

no. 3 just get over it

OHMAIGOSH like seriously mom! Just get over it!!!! so what if my blardee result suck? i mean COME ON LA! i seriously done my best ady WAT THE EFF do you want me to do ? i seriously can't do it ma..DIUUUUU.. u always say u freaking understand me but what do you really understand ? You understand nothing about me . Like honestly have you ever like ask me how was class today or anything ? NO~! ITS A BLARDEEE FREAKING NO~! dude seriously this suck!! FML! look down at me and say all shitty things about me I AINT GIVING A SHIT BOUT IT ! You'll regret what you said ! I FREAKING SWEAR !

Day 2 -Restless day

Assignment D:!!

Gahh just notice since i start college i've been like staying up late till 3 am ++~ @.@ imma be an owl soon LOLZ! :)))) i guess it's not a bad thing being an owl right :P ~ owelll~ if u're wondering why well ~ thanks to these assignment ~trust me there are more coming in @.@ gaaah owell ! this is just the first step towards my dream :) i aint gonna give up :DD

I'M GONNA PROVE TO THOSE ASSES THAT I CAN DO IT !!

For now , you can look down on me and tear me down , but bare this in mind that one day you will be wearing things i design and create and you'll be watching advertisment i drew :)

Anywayz~ time to go to bed :D peace out <3

Awesome night :3

Went to ss2 makan roti tisu with ze'shan-boner XD n fengyyy <3 it was fun hehehe got tease n bullied by Shannon on the way to the nasi kandar mamak -3- because of the bump ~~ I made weird funny noises that Shannon can't stop laughing -3- screw youuu !! Right after that we went to mcD :)) nom nom slurp slurp ::)))))) I love sundae strawberry <3 it's just so awesomeeee :) Definitely gonna hang out at night with them again :) it's time for bed now nights !!:))) <3 Here's

a shot of ze awesome roti tisu :3

i know it looks so freaking delicious right?:P

Day1 - I guess that's just how life changes me

lol bwahahah deleted all those horrible post of mine from 2009 ~ can't believe i'm trying to use this blog again . Hahaha i guess cause no one actually give a shit to me anymore that i have to use this and blab out everything that's inside of me :( HAIIH ~

I'm just an ordinary college student who just got her suck-ish result that used to have people and friends who care for her . But yeah~ time flies although its only been 3 months since we officially graduate from high school , it felt like it's been years . Why you ask? hmph it's like all your friends treat u like "OH ~! i used to be her friend " . Honestly , i thought college life would be more fun and friends over there would be more mature and stuff but i was wrong :/ Well not all of them are immature .AIKS !

Friends ? i used to think that friends are really important , and their like more important than my family , but then as time goes by i start to realise that what i used to think is wrong . I've hurt myself so many times till it is uncountable . my heart is full of scars n bruises that that can't seem to heal . Eventhough i'm always surrounded by friends , but that loneliness is still there . Cause i know that no matter how many billion or trillion friends i have , not all of them will always be there for me .

Saddest thing that just hap pend to me recently is that i have been lied by those i considered as family (buddies of mine ) . They just don't understand that it seriously hurt alot everytime they lie to me . Dont you guyz know how does it feel like? Just imagine one day if one of your best friend who you really trust the most lied to you , and you just act stupid not wanting him or her to know that you knew she or he was lying . Have you ever felt that pain before ? Have you?

I noticed that i'm changing into someone i'm not . I get all pissy so easily , i get mad easily and all those bad habit that i never did wanted to show you guyz last time .There's always a limit to everything yea know . i guess you guyz just blew the limit away so yea all these started to appear again . Sigh~ sometimes i just want to ask you guys these really simple question .

What am i to you?

Am i just a tool to you? A tool when u needed me only you will notice me and then put me aside when you dont need me ?

This is what you guyz are making me feel you know ? i dont wanna get hurt anymore . So yea i guess i cant be the same old Chingstah anymore .